Throughout Joyce Carol Oates’ story “Life after High School,” the main characters Zach Graff and Barbara “Sunny” Burhman each continually keep up a facade until they are freed of these through Zach’s tragic death. They are each hiding behind a mask; Barbara behind the nickname “Sunny” and Zach behind being the all too serious son of the prominent town doctor. Throughout the entire story, these two characters try to reveal their true selves through the people they are becoming.
Barbara is first given something to hide behind in the sixth grade when a teacher nicknames her “Sunny” because of her beautiful smile (489). From that point on, Sunny has now taken over for Barbara. Sunny is portrayed as being perfect in every way that she lives her life. She is compared to the golden girls, the popular, confident, good-looking girls, club officers, prom queens, and cheerleaders (485). Sunny is described as a girl who is “not a religious fanatic, but […] a devout Christian” (487). Volunteer work is also a part of her weekly routine, and her devout religious beliefs cause Sunny to be laughed at behind her back, but never to her face (487).
The death of Zach Graff changes all of this for Sunny. She no longer feels as if she has to be seen as the “golden girl” (485). Zach’s suicide causes Sunny to return to school less sunny, enthusiastic, and outgoing then she was before: “She withdrew her name from the balloting for the senior prom queen, she withdrew from her part in the senior play, she dropped out of the school choir, she did not participate in the annual state wide debating competition […]” (494). Sunny is able to let go of these many things. She is even able to let go of one of the things she once felt so passionately for, her religious faith. She does not “even [continue] to be a Christian” (495). Sunny no longer has to live up to standards for herself that seem to be put into place by her sixth grade teacher, parents, and even her church’s minister.
Many of Sunny’s actions indicate that she is taking a turn for the worse after she finishes high school. Many examples, though, go on to show that the return to the name “Barbara” brings about a whole new person: “The irony had not escaped Barbara Burhman that, in casting away his young life so recklessly, Zachary Graff had freed her for hers” (495). Barbara is finally free from the nickname that has made her good, happy, and faithful to a fault. She is able to find things that she really enjoys, and she ends up as a successful, married author. The death of Zach Graff has freed Barbara to live a life with a much different meaning than the one she had lead in high school.
Zach Graff, too, is able to escape the persona he is hiding behind. Although he chooses the alternate route of suicide, Zach is able to finally take off the mask that has hidden him for years. He chose death over continuing to hide the fact that he is homosexual from everyone. Still, only his best friend Tobias knows that he is homosexual, and Tobias keeps this secret until he meets up with Barbara when they are both successful adults (497). Despite this fact, there are still many clues that point to the fact that Zach is unhappy with the person he had become.
Zach is described as a lonesome, shy boy who has only one friend. His physical appearance also goes on to reveal many aspects of Zach’s personality, with his eyes being a main focal point. They are described as being “deep-set, with a look of watchfulness and secrecy […]” (487). His eyes are a key feature that could give away the fact that Zach is keeping the secret of who he really is. His eyes, however, are continuously hidden by chunky black glasses. These glasses appear many times in the story, especially in the first few pages. The glasses provide Zach with a barrier between who he really is and how everyone else sees him.
Zach goes to great lengths to remain just as everyone views him. He tries to cover up the fact that he is a homosexual and keep up the barrier he has created. From the beginning of the story, it is understood that Zach does not like sports. He is, however, coached by his father in golf. Although he says himself that he has “no natural talent for it” and that he finds it “profoundly boring” (487), Zach continues to play golf because this is in the context that the world sees him. After this line in the story, Zach pushes his glasses back up his nose, as if he is making sure that his disguise on.
As with Sunny, religion is introduced as a key part of Zach’s life. The tie between Zach and Sunny begins with religion: “Early on, Zachary seemed to have understood that, if he expressed doubt, for instance about ‘whether God exists’ and so forth, Sunny Burhman would listen seriously; and would talk with him earnestly […]” (487). Zach thinks seriously about religion, and this brings him closer to Sunny. Since Sunny is such a devout Christian at the time, she feels compelled to listen seriously and talk in depth with him. Through these interchanges, Zach comes to see Sunny as a piece of his disguise. If he can just convince her to marry him, Zach will be able to keep showing the world that he is heterosexual.
As the story progresses, Zach’s disguise grows with his seeming obsession of Sunny Burhman. This ultimately ruins his cover because of the proposal that is meant to show the world he is heterosexual. The night of this proposal, Zach seems to know that Sunny will decline his proposal. He says that “it would mean so much to him… life or death” (491). Sunny’s refusal ultimately sends him to Tobias. Zach is giving in to the very thing he has been trying to hide.
When Tobias and Barbara meet again as adults, Tobias fills Barbara in on this last piece of the puzzle that has been tormenting her through her adult life. Zach has only confided in Tobias about the secret of his homosexuality (497). When Barbara finds out that it is truly not her fault that Zach had killed himself, she is able to ask “with a tone of intellectual curiosity, ‘What do you think Zachary planned to do with the clothesline?’” (498). Barbara is able to return to the state she was in before the conversation ever back, and once again Zach Graff has set her free of who she was.
Zach and Sunny are examples of people who are stuck living hidden behind a mask. Sunny represents those who have had expectations laid out in front of them. For long stretches of time, Sunny is focused on the things she thinks others want her to focus on. Her personality changes throughout her life, and it seems that she can never really find her true self. Zach too feels pressured to live up to the person that society had dictated him to be. He is constantly stuck in the middle of who he wants to be, and who he is expected to be. Zach is never able to let who he really is shine through. He, like many others, chooses to end his life rather than continue to show the world someone he is not.
Works Cited
Oates, Joyce Carol. “Life after High School.” Perrine’s Literature: Structure, Sound, and Sense. 10th ed. Thomas R. Arp and Greg Johnson. Boston: Wadsworth, 2006. 484-498.
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On our first day of class, we were asked to write a little about why we were taking the class. I began by reminiscing about the days when I was younger and began reading out loud with my parents. Eventually I began writing my own little short stories, usually about some nonsense things. Even in high school, I was usually the only one in my group of friends that actually did the summer readings. And I didn’t do it because I felt I had to; I did it because for some strange reason, I actually wanted to. Even the books that I found entirely too boring, I just had to finish.
I came into this class not knowing what to expect. Obviously, from the class name, I knew we would be doing some writing about literature. I didn’t know what literature we would be reading, or what kinds of writings we would be doing. All I knew is that I had a nice big, new hardcover book that cost a lot of money.
After writing my first paper, I realized this type of writing would more difficult than I thought it was. One of the most difficult parts of the entire writing process was reading and critiquing the papers of my other classmates. It took a lot more time than I thought it would, and now I understand why many of my teachers took a while to get papers back to the students. It did, however, help me in the long run. I was able to read my own papers more critically than I had done before and recognize sentences that didn’t make sense, and even whole concepts that didn’t fit into the paper as a whole.
I had never been in a situation before like that of our in class workshops of our papers. I’ve written comments on papers before, but having a discussion about the papers as a whole group was new to me. It was interesting to hear what others thought of my paper. Comments written on a paper can only do so much. Actually hearing the points when people were confused, or when something just didn’t seem to fit into the paper had a huge impact on how I was able to view my own paper. It helped me to see my paper from a view that was different then my own. These discussions coupled with each individual’s comments turned out to be great tools in editing and rewriting those papers.
In the process of revising a previous paper, I realized just how far I’ve come as a writer. I was able to take the comments from my classmates and combine them with my own notes and create a far better paper when compared to the first draft I turned in. Taking a second look at my thesis showed me that a concise and analytical thesis is important for the entire paper to work. I learned how to relate my papers to the bigger picture. Papers are more interesting if they are related to something within the real world.
The poetry section of the class was particularly difficult for me. Even in high school, I was never able to fully grasp the concept of many types of poetry. Throughout our class discussion, I was able to gather a better understanding of reading poetry. It helped me to see that while some poems are meant for you to delve deeper, others mean just about exactly what is written on the page. In high school classes, it always seemed like we were trying to squeeze something out of the poem that was just not there. In our class discussions though, we were able to discuss the poems, and then simply move on to the next when there was nothing left to discuss.
Coming into this class, I had seriously contemplated having an English minor. Despite everything that I have learned, I have decided that an English minor is just not for me. I belive this is the biggest thing that I learned throughout the class. However interesting the explications on various works of literature turned out to be, I have discovered that this part of literature is just not for me. I will, however, take the skills that I learned throughout the term and apply them to different aspects of writing in other classes throughout the rest of my college career.
-Corinne Brauweiler
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